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    1.
     (2 weeks ago)       more like this  

    Imagine: you're having a party. People are dancing. Drinks are shaking. What don't you need? That's right, you don't need wires going everywhere and you don't need a turntable that will skip. What you DO need is a little Bluetooth device that can play all the tunes you've got on your phone, and the phone of all the strangers who snuck in just to get free booze. Which we've got right here. No, not the booze.

    Functions: CD Yes DVD No USB1 Yes USB2 No FM Yes AM No Audio IN1 Yes Audio IN2 No TV NO Bluetooth Yes (iAP over BT) Inputs and Outputs: Analog audio input 1 Analog audio output 1 USB port 1 Microphone input 2 (6? / Guitar available for one port - MIC 2 / GUITAR) Sound Features: Music equalizer MUSIC Football mode YES (OFF / Narration ON / Narration OFF) Video EQ MOVIE / GAME / DRAMA / NEWS FIESTA mode Yes Bass Boost function MEGA BASS DSEE sound enhancement DSEE (AUTO) Party chain (Wired) Yes ClearAudio+ Yes Sound Entertainment: Flanger Yes Isolator Yes Pan Yes (only by apps) Wah Yes (only by apps) Sampler Yes (Scratch and more) Lighting Effects: Speaker light Yes (multicolour) Party light Yes (Improve - R / G / B) Karaoke: Vocal fader Yes Key control Yes Song Reservation No Scoring Yes Mic Volume Yes Echo Yes Guide Vocal Yes Voice Changer No Convenience Features: Sleep timer Yes Touch keys Yes USB REC Yes Power Consumption: Power Consumption (in standby) 0.5W Wireless Connection: NFC One-touch pairing Yes Bluetooth: LDAC Yes AAC Yes A2DP (SINK) Yes AVRCP Yes (Ver1.5) SPP Yes Tuner Specs: Band FM External Antenna Yes (75 ohm) Tuning Range (FM) 87.5-108 MHz / 100 kHz Preset Channel FM20 Case Features: Tray Lock Yes Child Lock Yes Carrying Handle Yes (Side) Compatible Discs: CD Yes CD-R Yes CD-RW Yes Front Speaker Specifications: Tweeter 4 cm x 2 (cone type) Mid-range 8 cm x 2 (cone type) Woofer 20 cm x 1 (Mica) Subwoofer Specifications: Sound pressure horn (Back-loaded horn) Yes (SPH) Case Dimensions: Main Unit Dimensions (W x H x D cm) (Approx.) 293 x 798 x 300 mm Weight (kg)(Approx.) 14 KG

    In the Box (Retail Packaging):

    (1) Sony MHCV50 High-Power Home Audio System with Bluetooth Technology (1) Remote

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    2.
     (6 hours ago)       more like this  

    In some topsy-turvy world there are government conspiracies, a weird monster, and a bunch of young people trying to bring the scary things to an end. In our world, there are... well, okay, you've got us there. Point for you.

    Specifications Height Capacity: 4'8" - 6'6" (142 - 198 cm) Weight Capacity: 300 lbs (136 kg) Assembled Weight: 65.4 lbs

    In the box:

    (1) Teeter 960 Ltd. Inversion Table (Blemished) Getting Started DVD with Bonus Healthy Back Routines Lumbar Bridge Adjustable Head Pillow Eight Acupressure Nodes Full-Color Glossy Owner's Manual

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    3.
     (2 days ago)       more like this  

    Hi Carol, I hope you like the Sony audio products I bought for you. I know you already had a bunch of other audio stuff in your home but I took the liberty of throwing it all out. You'll thank me later. Or thank me now, go ahead. I like being thanked. Anyway, while I was in your house I also rearranged your furniture and repainted your walls. And I think I left my coyote in there, be careful. Your best friend, Carol.

    Size & Weight

    Main Unit Size - Body Only (W x H x D) (in): 2 x 33.5 x 4.6 in Main Unit Weight - Body Only: 5.29 lb Subwoofer Size (W x H x D) (in): 13.47 x 6.69 x 15 in Subwoofer Weight (lb): 14.55 lb

    Amplifier

    A / V Sync: YES Amplifier Channels: 2.1 ch S-Force PRO Front Surround: S-Force PRO Front Surround LPCM (2CH / 5.1CH / 7.1CH) thru HDMI: YES Power Output (Total): 300W

    Subwoofer

    Subwoofer Type: Wireless subwoofer Speaker System: Full range speaker Subwoofer Driver: 5.12 in cone

    Interface

    Input and Output Terminals: Analog Audio In (Inc TV CEC) (1), Bluetooth? Reception/NFC, USB HDMI Inputs: 3 HDMI Out(ARC): 1 Optical Audio Inputs: 1 Analog Audio Inputs: 1

    Audio Formats

    Dolby: Dolby Digital, Dolby Digital+, Dolby Dual Mono, Dolby TrueHD LPCM: LPCM - 2 ch, LPCM - 5.1 ch, LPCM - 7.1 ch PCM: 96k/24 bit PCM DTS: DTS, DTS-HD, DTS 96/24 DTS HD Master Audio: YES Dolby TrueHD/Dolby Digital+: YES / YES

    Equalizer

    Sound Effects:?ClearAudio+, Game, Movie, Music, Portable Audio, Sports, Standard

    Video Features

    1080 / 24p: YES 1080p: YES BRAVIA SYNC (CEC Control): YES 3D-capable HDMI Pass Thru: YES Deep Color: YES x.v.Color (xvYCC): Triluminos Display

    Details

    Power Consumption: BAR:37 W / SW:20 W Remote Commander: RMT-AH101U Standby: BAR:0.5 W / SW:0.5 W Speaker Type: Bar type

    In The Box:

    Sony HTCT380 300W 2.1 CH Soundbar Subwoofer

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    4.
     (3 days ago)       more like this  

    Rejected commercial for the Dell 790 SFF Desktop:

    PERSON: Hey I ordered a pizza!

    PIZZA DELIVERY: And I brought you a Dell 790 SFF instead!

    [they hi-five for 20 years]

    [HP logo appears]

    Specifications: Processor: Intel Core i5-2400 3.1GHz (Turbo up to 3.4GHz)
    6MB Cache Processor Core: Quad-Core Memory: 8GB DDR3 (supports up to 16GB) Memory Slots: 4 Graphics: Integrated Intel HD Graphics 2000 Hard Drive: 2TB SATA 5400RPM Hard Drive
    180GB Solid State Drive Card Reader: No Optical Drive: Slimline DVD-ROM Sound: Integrated Network: 10/100/1000 Gigabit Ethernet Wireless: No I/O Ports: (1) DisplayPort
    (1) VGA
    (10) USB 2.0
    (1) Internal USB 2.0
    (1) RJ-45 LAN
    (2) PS/2
    (1) Serial
    (1) Headphone
    (1) Microphone
    (1) Audio: Line-in
    (1) Audio: Line-out Expansion Slots & Bays: (1) Half-Height PCIe x16 Slot
    (1) Half-Height PCIe x16 (wired x 4) Slot
    (1) Slimline 5.25" External Drive Bay
    (1) 3.5" Internal Drive Bay Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Professional 64-bit Power Supply: 240W Max Dimensions: 12.3"(L) x 3.7"(W) x 11.4"(H) Weight: 12.57 lbs

    In the box:

    Dell Optiplex 790 Small Form Factor Desktop, Intel Core i5-2400 3.1GHz Quad-Core, 8GB DDR3, 2TB Hard Drive & 180GB SSD, Win10Pro 64-Bit Power Cable USB Mouse USB Keyboard

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    5.
     (4 days ago)       more like this  

    Think about every "workman" image in your head. Think about it. Be it on TV or in a movie or in a play or in a painting or really anywhere, your "workman" image probably has a few things. The first is jeans or denim overalls. The second is a hammer. And the third is a ladder. Everything else is just extra, right? Right. You can't TRULY be a workman without a ladder. Case closed.

    In the box:

    Workman 17 or 22 Foot Multi-Configuration Ladder

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    6.
     (5 days ago)       more like this  

    Rejected commercial for the HP 8300 Elite:

    ROBOT JET FIGHTER: I'm a jet fighter with the brain of a cat! But when I'm not dominating the skies thanks to my hunting instincts, I like to relax watching videos of little red dots on my HP 8300 Elite. Ha ha ha ha! There's one now! Woo hoo, look at it zip around! Ha ha ha ha ha! Meow!

    [HP logo appears]

    Specifications: Processor: Intel Core i5-3470 3.2GHz (Turbo up to 3.6GHz)
    6MB Cache Processor Core: Quad-Core Memory: 8GB DDR3; supports up to 16GB Memory Slots: 4 Graphics: Integrated Intel HD 2500 Graphics Video Ports: VGA, DisplayPort Hard Drive: 500GB SATA 5400RPM Optical Drive: DVD-ROM Sound: Integrated Network: 10/100/1000 Gigabit Ethernet Wireless: No Front Panel: (4) USB 2.0
    (1) Headphone
    (1) Microphone Rear Panel: (1) DisplayPort
    (1) VGA
    (4) USB 3.0
    (2) USB 2.0
    (1) RJ-45 LAN
    (1) Audio: Line-in/Microphone
    (1) Audio: Line-out
    (1) Serial Port Expansion Slots & Bays: (1) Low-Profile PCI Slot
    (1) Low-Profile PCI Express x16 Slot
    (2) Low-Profile PCI Express x1 Slots
    (1) External 5.25" Drive Bay
    (1) Internal 3.5" Drive Bay
    (1) External 3.5" Drive Bay Operating System: No Operating System Installed Power Supply: 240W Max Dimensions: 14.9"(L) x 3.95"(W) x 13.3"(H)

    Please Note: No Operating System, Keyboard or Mouse is included.

    In the box:

    HP 8300 Elite Small Form Factor Desktop, Intel Core i5-3470 3.2GHz Quad-Core, 8GB DDR3, 500GB SATA, No Operating System Power Cable

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    7.
     (5 days ago)       more like this  

    I learned everything I know about touching from my HP Touch laptop. You could probably call me a Touch Master because I made a t-shirt that says so. My Touch laptop has taught me that my "touch" can "open" any number of "applications", which sounded sexier in my head when Marvin Gaye was playing in the background. Get an HP Touch laptop and maybe one day, you too will make a t-shirt for yourself. Specifications: Processor: AMD A10-9600P 2.4GHz (Turbo up to 3.3GHz)
    2MB Cache Processor Core: Quad-Core Screen Size: 15.6" Aspect Ratio: 16:9 Resolution: 1366 x 768 Display Type: HD SVA LED-backlit Touchscreen Graphics: AMD Radeon R5 graphics Memory: 12GB DDR4-2133 SDRAM (2-DIMM) Hard Drive 1TB SATA 5400RPM Optical Drive: SuperMulti DVD burner Network: 10/100 BASE-T Ethernet Wireless: 802.11ac Bluetooth: Yes Card Reader: Multi-format digital media card reader Speakers: Stereo Sound: HD audio with DTS Studio Sound Webcam: VGA Microphone: Integrated Digital Keyboard: Full-sized island-style keyboard with numeric keypad Pointing Device: Touchpad with multi-touch gesture support I/O Ports: HDMI: 1 USB 3.0: 1 USB 2.0: 2 RJ-45: 1 Combo Headphone/Mic Jack: 1 Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Home (64-bit) Power: 45W AC Adapter 3-cell, 31 Wh Li-ion battery Dimensions: 15.12 x 10.02 x 0.95 in Weight: 4.73 lbs

    ?

    In the box:

    HP 15-BA113CL 15.6" Notebook, HD Touchscreen, AMD A10-9600P Quad-Core 2.4GHz, 12GB DDR4, 1TB SATA, 802.11ac, Win10H - Silver AC Adapter

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    8.
     (1 week ago)       more like this  

    No more cellular-lap-tablets for me! I just want to sit down at my DESK and surf the web on my DESKtop computer. I even have a special chair for my desk where I look at my computer. I call it my computer-chair. Unlike most of the other chairs in my house, my computer-chair has wheels. It's just like the one I have at the office, actually. When I sit at my DESKtop computer in my computer-chair it's like I'm still at work! ? Specifications: Processor: Intel Core i5-7400 3.0GHz (Turbo up to 3.5GHz)
    6MB Cache Processor Core: Quad-Core Memory: 12GB DDR4-2133, 2-DIMM Max Memory: 16GB Memory Slots: 2 Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 630 Hard Drive: 128GB TLC Solid State Drive
    1TB SATA Hard Drive (7200rpm) Optical Drive: DVD?RW drive Sound: 5.1 Surround Sound Network: 10/100/1000 Gigabit Ethernet Wireless: 802.11 a/b/g/n/ac Bluetooth: Yes, 4.2 Top I/O Ports: (2) USB 3.0
    (1) USB 3.0 Type- C
    (1) Headphone/Microphone Combo
    7-in-1 multimedia card reader Rear I/O Ports: (2) USB 3.0
    (2) USB 2.0
    (2) HDMI
    (1) RJ-45
    (3) Audio Expansion Slots & Bays: (1) PCI Express x1 slots
    (1) PCI Express x16 slot
    (1) M.2 socket 1, key A Slot
    (1) 5.25" Drive Bay (occupied)
    (1) 3.5" Drive Bay (occupied) Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Home 64-bit Power Supply: 300W Max Dimensions: 15.94"(L) x 6.50"(W) x 16.79"(H) Weight: 21.72 lbs


    In the box:

    HP ENVY 750-514 Desktop, Intel Core i5-7400 Quad-Core 3.0GHz, 12GB DDR4, 128GB SSD + 1TB HDD, 802.11ac, Bluetooth, Win10H Power Cable USB Keyboard & Mouse

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    9.
     (2 weeks ago)       more like this  

    Nova Oleo slapped the starship's controls into autopilot and leaned back, sighing. She'd joined the Interstellar Defense Force to solve problems, to fight space crime, to battle pirates. But ever since the Lenovo AIO Desktops took over, everything was too perfect! All she did was ferry magazines back and forth to the outposts! It drove her mad! If only the Lenovo AIO computers weren't so perfect... Specifications: Processor: Intel i5-3470S 2.9GHz Quad-Core (Turbo up to 3.6GHz)
    6MB Cache Screen: 20" 1600x900 LED 16:9 (Non-Touch) Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 2500 Memory: 8GB DDR3 (Supports up to 8GB) Hard Drive: 1TB SATA 5400RPM Optical Drive: DVD-ROM Network: 10/100/1000 Gigabit Ethernet Wireless: 802.11b/g/n Audio: Integrated Speakers: Stereo Webcam: Yes Rear I/O Ports: USB 2.0: 4 RJ-45: 1 DisplayPort: 1 Side I/O Ports: USB 2.0: 2 Headphone: 1 Microphone: 1 Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Professional (64-bit) Power: 150W Dimensions & Weight: 20" x 2.8" x 16.2", 15.55lbs

    ?

    In the box:

    Lenovo ThinkCentre M72Z 20" All-In-One Desktop, Intel Core i5-3770S Quad-Core 2.9GHz, 1TB SATA, 8GB DDR3, 802.11n, Win10Pro USB Wired Keyboard & Mouse Power Cable

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    10.
     (2 weeks ago)       more like this  

    This laptop is a professional. It wears business attire 24/7. It drinks coffee for breakfast lunch and dinner. It nods along in meetings and says "Let's have a follow-up on this issue in two weeks." It keeps its desk clean and tidy. It returns phone calls promptly. It has a nice firm handshake. This laptop is a professional laptop. Specifications: Processor: Intel Core i5-4300M 2.6GHz (Turbo up to 3.3 GHz)
    3MB Smart Cache Processor Core: Dual-Core Screen Size: 14" Aspect Ratio: 16:9 Resolution: 1366 x 768 Display Type: HD Anti-Glare LED-backlit Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 4600 Memory: 8GB DDR3 Memory; Supports up to 16GB Memory Slots: 2 Hard Drive: 128GB Solid State Drive Optical Drive: SuperMulti DVD?RW Network: 10/100/1000 Gigabit Ethernet Wireless: 802.11b/g/n Bluetooth: Yes Card Reader: Digital Media Card Reader Battery: 6-Cell Lithium-Ion Speakers: Stereo Webcam: Yes Microphone: Integrated Keyboard: Spill-resistant keyboard with drain Pointing Device: Touchpad with on/off button, two-way scroll, gestures Fingerprint Reader: No I/O Ports: DisplayPort: 1 USB 3.0: 4 VGA: 1 RJ-45: 1 Docking Connector: 1 Headphone/Microphone Combo: 1 Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Professional (64-bit) Power: 65W AC Adapter
    6-Cell Lithium-Ion Battery Dimensions: 13.39"(W) x 0.99"(H) x 9.33"(D) Weight: 4.4 lbs

    ?

    In the box:

    HP ProBook 640-G1 14" Notebook, Intel Core i5-4300M 2.6GHz, 128GB Solid State Drive, 8GB DDR3, 802.11n, Bluetooth, Win10Pro 6-Cell Lithium-Ion Battery AC Adapter

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    11.
     (2 weeks ago)       more like this  

    Here are some other signs that you need a new computer:

    -Your computer has one of those old green and black screens

    -You can cook an entire dinner while you wait for a single website to load

    -Your computer has started sending you weird messages about a prophecy and something called "The Matrix"

    Specifications: Processor: Intel i7-6700HQ 2.6GHz (Turbo up to 3.5GHz)
    6MB Cache Processor Core: Quad-Core Screen Size: 17.3" Aspect Ratio: 16:9 Resolution: 1920 x 1080 Display Type: Full-HD IPS UWVA Anti-Glare WLED-backlit Graphics: NVIDIA GeForce GTX 965M 4GB GDDR5 Memory: 12GB DDR4-2133 SDRAM (1 x 4GB, 1 x 8GB) Hard Drive: 1TB SATA 7200 RPM
    256GB PCIe NVMe M.2 Solid State Drive Optical Drive: SuperMulti DVD?RW drive Network: Integrated 10/100/1000 GbE LAN Wireless: 2x2 802.11ac Bluetooth: Yes Card Reader: Multi-format SD media card reader Sound: Bang & Olufsen with dual speakers Webcam: HP Wide Vision HD Camera Microphone: Dual array Digital Microphone Keyboard: Full-size island-style backlit with numeric keypad Pointing Device: HP Imagepad with multi-touch gesture support I/O Ports: HDMI: 1 RJ-45: 1 USB 3.0: 2 USB 2.0: 1 Combo Headphone/Mic Jack: 1 Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Home (64-bit) Power: 150W Smart AC Adapter
    6-cell 62 WHr Lithium-Ion battery Dimensions: 16.3 x 10.98 x 1.17 in Weight: 6.28 lbs

    ?

    In the box:

    HP OMEN 17-W053DX Gaming Laptop, 17.3" Full-HD IPS Display, Intel Core i7-6700HQ Quad-Core 2.6GHz, NVIDIA GeForce GTX 965M 4GB, 1TB SATA + 256GB NVMe SSD, 12GB DDR4, 802.11ac, Bluetooth, Win10H AC Adapter

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    12.
     (2 weeks ago)       more like this  

    Sure, you know Microsoft Word. But do you know Microsoft Word on a RED laptop? Oh yeah? What about a BLUE laptop. Oh. Ok, well what about a-- What? Well they can't all be the same. No, that wouldn't make any sense. Why would they make them in different colors if they didn't have different secret powers? Specifications: Processor: Intel Celeron N3060 1.6GHz (Burst up to 2.48GHz)
    2MB Cache Processor Core: Dual-Core Screen Size: 15.6" Aspect Ratio: 16:9 Resolution: 1366 x 768 Display Type: HD WLED-backlit Touchscreen Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 400 Memory: 4GB DDR3L SDRAM (1-DIMM) Hard Drive: 1TB SATA 5400RPM Optical Drive: SuperMulti DVD?RW drive Network: 10/100BASE-T Ethernet LAN Wireless: Intel 802.11b/g/n/ac (2x2) Wi-Fi Bluetooth: Yes, 4.2 Card Reader: Multi-format digital media card reader for SD cards Speakers: Stereo Sound: Integrated Webcam: HD Webcam Microphone: Integrated Dual-Array Digital Keyboard: Full-size island-style keyboard with numeric keypad Pointing Device: Touchpad with multi-touch gesture support I/O Ports: HDMI: 1 USB 3.1 Gen 1: 2 USB 2.0: 1 RJ-45: 1 Combo Headphone/Mic Jack: 1 Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Home (64-bit) Power: 45W AC Adapter
    4-cell 41WHr Lithium-Ion Battery Dimensions: 0.93 in (H) x 14.96 in (W) x 9.99 in (D) Weight: 4.65 lbs

    ?

    In the box:

    HP 15-BS000 15.6" Touchscreen Notebook, Intel N3060 Dual-Core, 1TB SATA, 4GB DDR3, 802.11ac, Bluetooth, Win10H - (Your Choice: Color) 3-Cell Lithium-Ion Battery AC Adapter

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    13.
     (4 weeks ago)       more like this  

    Raiders of the Lost Ark: Opening sequence, replace the golden idol with an HP Pavilion. Or maybe replace the boulder.

    Remember the Titans: Replace the football with an HP Pavilion.

    Star Wars: Replace Obi-Wan's light saber with--no better yet, replace the medals given at the end with HP Pavilions. And the Death Star. And all the ships.

    Jumanji: Didn't see it. Uh...replace the...Jumanji.

    The Preacher's Wife: Replace Denzel with an HP Pavilion.

    Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2: Was there a part 2? Replace the pants. Or the sisterhood.

    Thor: Replace Thor's legs with HP Pavilions. And make the hammer a donut.

    The Piano: Replace everything but the piano.

    Specifications: Processor: Intel Core i5-7400 3.0GHz (Turbo up to 3.5GHz)
    6MB Cache Processor Core: Quad-Core Memory: 16GB DDR4; 2-DIMM Max Memory: 16GB Memory Slots: 2 Graphics: AMD Radeon R7 450 2GB Hard Drive: 1TB SATA (7200rpm) Optical Drive: DVD?RW Audio Chipset: Integrated HD Audio Sound: 5.1 channel audio Network: 10/100/1000 Gigabit Ethernet Wireless: 802.11 a/b/g/n/ac Bluetooth: Yes Front Panel: (2) USB 3.0
    (1) Headphone Jack
    (1) Microphone Jack Rear Panel: (2) USB 3.0
    (2) USB 2.0
    (1) HDMI
    (1) DisplayPort
    (1) DVI
    (1) VGA
    (1) RJ-45 LAN
    (3) Audio Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Home (64-bit) Power Supply: 180W Max Dimensions: 12.4 x 6.42 x 12.09 in Weight: 12.57?lbs

    ?

    In the box:

    HP Pavilion 510-P017C Desktop, Intel Core i5-7400 Quad-Core 3.0GHz, AMD Radeon R7 450 2GB, 16GB DDR4, 1TB SATA, 802.11ac, Win10H USB Keyboard & Mouse Power Cord

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    14.
     (4 weeks ago)       more like this  

    Boy oh boy, we at Shirt.Woot sure are looking forward to seeing Chris Hemsworth looking all Nordic and fierce. Cate Blanchett is going to wear a big hat, which I think we can all agree is awesome. The hulk will put something other than purple shorts on for at least one scene, so that's nice. And the movie trailer makes it look like there will be at least a solid hour of explosions. It's basically the best movie ever, and it isn't even out yet.

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